10 reasons why you haven’t caught RBM

Turn on the news right now. I dare you. Or take one look at a tabloid. You’ve been putting it off, I understand. Royal Baby Mania (or RBM) is spreading like a hybrid of the plague and Bieber Fever, and you most certainly do not want to catch it. But you’re simply putting off the inevitable.

There is no vaccine to what is otherwise known as acting-like-an-over-protective-mother-even-though-you-are-not-related-to-the-royal-baby syndrome (people generally prefer RBM). Your only hope is to lock your doors, close your windows, break your phone, dislocate your television, eat your Apple products, and purposefully unleash a virus onto your computer by delving into the dark alleyways of the internet…

But not before you’ve read this post. ;)
Continue reading